“Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing it is stupid.” – Anonymous.
When I was a kid, I used to love to draw comics. I drew them the same way each time and always in a composition book. I kept stacks of them in my bedroom. At first, the stacks were kept out in the open in my bedroom in pride. I spent hours going back through the comics, assigning characters, roles, back stories, and more. I lived an entire life in these composition books and I loved it.
However, in middle school, I realized other girls my age weren’t doing the same things, so I shoved my stacks of composition books into a hiding spot in the far back corner of my room. When a group of girls came over and found my books, I was mortified, and as expected, they laughed. I acted as if I had never seen those drawings before, threw them out, and I stopped drawing my comics.
I stopped drawing my comics not because I didn’t like it anymore, not because my motivations were changing, but because society, and a small group of middle school girls told me that’s not what I am supposed to like. I, of course, agreed with the group of girls: drawing comics and creating elaborate, complex lives for those characters…not fun (a lie I told myself).
That’s how many neurodivergent people learn how to mask by hiding and suppressing their natural strengths, interests, and way of being in the interest of pleasing others. From a young age I learned a clear message. Whether it was from the teachers who consistently put me in the hallway for talking too much, the adults who called me the class clown when I shared different ideas, or the group of girls who told me what to like, what to wear, and how to think—adapt to these norms or fail.
However, I could never comfortably meet the expectations others and myself were setting, which led me to resent the way my brain worked (and didn’t work). When I turned 30, after nearly a decade of working with neurodivergent individuals, I decided to look inward. I realized that many of the traits I had come to cherish in them—traits that others often labeled as ‘bad’ or ‘inappropriate’—were present in me as well. Then, at 30, when I received my ADHD diagnosis, I finally understood that what I had once seen as ‘deficits’ are actually differences—and those differences can be strengths.
Neurodiversity by Definition:
Neurotypical (NT) describes people whose brain development and cognitive functioning follow what is considered the societal “norm”. Their thought patterns, attention, sensory processing, and social behaviors generally align with typical expectations. Neurodiverse (ND) or Neurodivergent (ND) refers to people whose brains function differently from the neurotypical norm. This includes diagnoses like ADHD, autism, dyslexia, OCD, Tourette’s and more.
However, the focus in this blog, as it pertains to most of my own experiences and competencies, refer specifically to individuals with Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD), Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) or both, commonly referred to now as AuDHD.
Neurodivergent (ND) Strengths:
Sometimes all we need to see something in a different way is to reframe the language around it. We can start to view our “deficits” as differences, focusing on the extreme variability in what it means to be human. We can view strengths as overused or underused based on where the individual is, what they are doing, and the group they wish to belong to. For example, caring only about one thing may not be useful in a classroom group discussion about anything but that one thing, but it’s very useful when that one thing you care about is the topic of the group discussion.
When we look at strengths, it’s crucial to keep in mind that a personal characteristic with great potential to be a strength, may be a limitation if we refuse to adapt the environment to support those characteristics. Even more so, we can begin to look at strengths on a continuum that relies heavily on the environment and the supports we put into place.
To illustrate this, I think of a client I had a few years back. Whenever he was asked to write, he would scream “no”, rip the paper into pieces, hit his teacher, and try to run out of the room. The team was frustrated, often saying “but he’s an amazing writer” and “he loves to write”. We tried various interventions that focused heavily on rewarding him anytime he sat and worked on his writing. However, we could not even get him to sit and start, so most of his writing time was dedicated to managing his emotional distress and crisis behaviors.
The Occupational Therapist (OT) on the team helped us to reframe this. She told us that if we allowed him to lay on the ground while writing the task, it would be much easier for him and he would feel much more regulated. The next day for writing we laid out a yoga mat and his teacher asked if he wanted to lay on the floor while writing, he lit up with joy, laughed in disbelief, and laid down within seconds. That day, there was no throwing, yelling, hitting, or running. His writing strengths could now flourish because the environment was changed to support him. Now, he writes for fun and often brings his writings around for anyone who wants to hear them.
It’s been argued, and researched, that NT strengths and “natural” ways of being, fit into the larger societal expectation more easily and with less inner, and external, conflict than those with ND brains. In the world we live in, many NT brains can thrive, yet ND brains struggle. As a result, we focus on teaching, and at times, forcing, ND brains to suppress their natural strengths in favor of “fitting in” to an environment that others see as “normal”, “typical”, and “appropriate”.
To best understand how environments can be set up to support Neurodiverse individuals, it’s helpful to look at what some of these common strengths are, as well as strategies to incorporate those strengths into daily moments.
A List of Some, Certainly Not All, Neurodivergent Characteristics:
Hyperfixation and Hyperfocus: Hyperfixation is when someone becomes deeply absorbed in a topic, hobby, or activity they love, often returning to it repeatedly over time. Hyperfocus is when a person channels intense concentration into a task, fully immersing themselves and sometimes tuning out the world around them—both are natural ways neurodiverse minds engage with their passions and strengths.
Last year, I watched an episode of Survivor on a whim. Now, I watch 2 seasons at once, listen to podcasts, read blogs, and talk about Survivor whenever I get the chance to. A hyperfixation that demands my attention and soothes my brain when it’s getting loud.
I have worked with so many clients who have hyperfixations that others see as unconventional and I myself, in the past, have worked with clients to “develop more appropriate interests”. This range of intense special interests spanning from ceiling fans, Chuck-E-Cheese floor plans, logos/brands, maps, and more, have shown me just how unique individuals’ preferences can be. As I continue to see the joy and comfort these interests bring to those around me, I’ve learned to see hyperfixation and hyperfocus as a profoundly unique strength.
To empower those with strong hyperfixations and hyperfocus, try the following:
- Instead of labeling something as “weird” or “unconventional”, share in their joy around that topic. Ask questions, make comments, and even learn about it yourself a bit.
- Allow access to comfort items: If your client loves a specific Target receipt from a trip they took two months ago and they like to have it with them while learning, let them. A comfortable learning experience can help ND strengths thrive.
- Incorporate special interests into worksheets, activities, and more. Instead of pushing them towards “more appropriate” interests, use those strong interests to increase engagement, motivation, and JOY.
Justice and Fairness: Perhaps this characteristic comes from what is widely considered to be a “deficit” in ND individuals- which is that some NDs have rigid thinking patterns that often view things as “black or white” forgetting to leave room for the “gray area”. As a result, ND brains feel safer when they perceive fairness in a given situation.
However, we can support and empower NDs to use their strong sense of justice in the following ways:
- Give these individuals the rationale or the ‘why’ when asking them to do something or engage in an activity. These brains thrive on logic and reason and they do not respond to “because I said so”.
- Assign them classroom jobs, home chores, and/or responsibilities that focus on being a strong helper in the community, classroom, and family.
Innovation and Creativity: ND individuals are creative problem solvers. However, problem solving looks different and often doesn’t follow the same processes of NT brains. As a result, ND brains can solve problems in innovative ways. Just the other day my client was given a fine motor task to put small pieces into a container through the small holes on the top. As his teacher rushed them to wrap up activities, I saw the worry sink in that he wouldn’t be able to complete the task to get to snack time. When his teacher walked away, he immediately took off the entire lid, shoved the pieces inside, closed the lid, and told the teacher to look while clapping.
Did he follow the directions? No. Did he work on his fine motor skills? Also, no. However, he did quickly solve a problem in a new way and moved on to snack without spending the next 10 minutes in distress trying to complete a task he may not be prepared to complete yet.
How can we continue to encourage innovation and creative problem solving? Here are some ideas:
- Engage in collaborative problem solving with them. Do not insist that someone completes a task exactly as prescribed by others but work with them to complete a task in a way that works for them and their ND strengths.
- Do not solve a problem for them in the interest of time, convenience, or “keeping the peace”. Let them take the time to problem solve for themselves even if it takes longer.
- For example, if there are tasks that need to be completed for a project, give them a blank checklist and ask the order they want to complete the project in instead of giving them a pre-filled checklist.
- Or, if they are arguing with a peer while building a tower because they want to do it a specific way, do not just tell them to choose a different activity, or ask the peer to find another activity. Instead, ask the peer and your client how they can come up with a new tower idea together.
Autonomy and Self-Determination: A common misconception is that ND individuals are unable to advocate for themselves to meet their own needs. Often, when NDs do attempt to advocate for their needs and preferences, they are labeled as defiant and non-compliant. When in actuality they have a strong drive towards autonomy and independence, but it just looks different. Even more so, when they set a goal, they will work tirelessly towards that goal. However, the more we push for their goals to be the same as ours, the more we will be met with resistance.
Instead, you can encourage autonomy and self-determination, in the following ways:
- Give ND individuals choices of what to do, how to do, where to do it, and who they do it with. Of course, this is within reason as often our ND learners still need some guidance from us. However, the more choice, the more they feel autonomy, and the more autonomy, the more an ND brain can thrive.
- Allow them to attempt tasks and activities on their own and presume they can do it before deciding they can’t do it.
- Teach ND self-advocacy skills at all costs. This includes teaching NDs how to say no, get help when needed, and advocate for learning that best suits them.
The best place to start is by reframing how you view all brains and all learning. By shifting away from seeing one neurotype as better or worse, you can spend less time trying to fit neurodivergent brains into environments designed for neurotypical ones. Instead, you can focus on discovering creative, collaborative ways for neurodivergent brains to thrive on their own terms.
Let us help you be the best advocate for your child. Reach out at acclaimautism.com
Learn more by listening here:
The Neurodiversity Podcast: Episode 211: Turning Neurodiversity Barriers Into Benefits
On Episode 211, Emily Kircher-Morris talks with Brooke Schnittman, founder of Coaching with Brooke and author of Activate Your ADHD Potential. They discuss the barriers faced by ADHDers, the strengths of ADHD brains, the influence of the neurodiversity framework, the shift in our understanding of ADHD, the importance of structure and systems, her favorite tool for getting thoughts out of the head, and more. It’s a great conversation with plenty of usable advice and ideas.
For more reading on this topic, please check out the following resources:
Hendry, A., & Scerif, G. (2023). Moulding environmental contexts to optimise neurodiverse executive function performance and development: A goodness-of-fit account. Infant and Child Development, 32(5), e2448. https://doi.org/10.1002/icd.2448
Johansen, Michael G., “Character Strengths in Applied Behavior Analysis and the Treatment of Autism Spectrum Disorder: A Pilot Study” (2024). CUNY Academic Works. https://academicworks.cuny.edu/cc_etds_theses/1178
McComas, J.J., Wilczynski, S., Cerda, ML. et al. Ableism in Applied Behavior Analysis: A Beginner’s Guide to Understanding and Dismantling Ableism in Practice with Autistic People. Behav Analysis Practice (2025). https://doi.org/10.1007/s40617-025-01128-y
Mottron, L. (2017). Should we change targets and methods of early intervention in autism, in favor of a strengths-based education? European Child & Adolescent Psychiatry, 26(7), 815-825. doi:https://doi.org/10.1007/s00787-017-0955-5
Xia Y, Wang P, Vincent J. Why we need neurodiversity in brain and behavioral sciences. Brain-X. 2024; 2:e70. https://doi.org/10.1002/brx2.70
(This blog offers general educational information and is not medical advice. Always consult your child’s clinicians for individualized recommendations.)
